Late March, right on the heels of early April, and still no rain in sight.

Fort Myers News-Press headlines shout about drought, historically low levels in monitoring wells, brush fires engulfing acres and enforcement officers fining unlawful waterers.

Our famous canals look more shallow and murky then I’ve ever seen them and the fake ponds dug outside of our big-box stores and supermarket plazas have become mere puddles crowded with thirsty birds and plastic trash.

The non-native plantings in my yard thirst, parched by the too-many-months of watering restrictions they’ve been forced to endure.  The leaves wilt every ten or twelve days and I frantically rush them too-small sips of sulfur flavored water somewhere between work and errands.

My lawn is so dry even the dollar-weeds have curled up and died, blowing away, brown organic dust in the Cape Coral wind.  Each morning I walk out to check my mail and mourn the premature death of my once green grass.  Still, our lawn-guy shows up once a week and trims the corpse of our lawn.  The wheels of his ride on mower leave deep ruts in the mud that used to be our beautiful landscaping.  His bills always arrive on time. 

The pool I haven’t used since last September loses about three inches of water a week.  The uninitiated might convince themselves it’s sprung a leak, but I’ve been here long enough to know it’s just evaporating.  Two sub-tropical years have thinned my blood.  Now I won't even consider entering the pool until the thermometer breaks 90.  Still, our pool lady shows up once a week to clean the pollen and errant lizards.  She leaves forceful notes demanding we add more water immediately whenever we forget.  Her bills always arrive on time.

Home ownership is the most overrated of the American Dreams.  I think it’s time to buy a townhouse.  I just want to pay an HOA, and let someone else do all the thinking and small tasks.

It’s at least two more months wait before the summer rains arrive, bringing with them the threat of early season hurricanes.

Call it what you want…this is southwest Florida and I can’t picture myself ever wanting to live anywhere else.